More than 4,500 people have reacted so far and some 4,000 have commented on a man's social media post over the weekend in which he announced that he is not going to forgive his "cheating wife" after she went away on a "girls' trip" and wound up with another man.
Indicating his personal turmoil, however, he labeled his post, "Am I wrong for not giving my cheating wife another chance?"
Sharing his story on the Reddit page known as "Am I wrong," the man said he's 39 years old and his wife is 33.
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The couple have been together for 14 years, said "HippoOK9111," have been married for 10 years and have a 7-year-old daughter.
He said that recently she "went away on a girls' trip. I was not worried at all. I have never had a reason to distrust her."
The man said she's "never done anything to give me a cause for concern — and it’s not like she was even going abroad."
He added, "She was going to a Butlins half an hour away," referencing a seaside resort chain in the U.K.
He noted that she "went with her sister and a few other girls."
That wasn't the end of it, though.
He wrote, "She called me up this morning, and I didn’t expect anything other than her checking in. She [had] only been away one night of a three-night trip."
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However, when the man answered the phone, he said his wife "was crying, and incoherent."
He said, "When I finally calmed her down, she told me she had slept with someone else the night before."
The Reddit poster shared all the details that his wife apparently relayed to him.
The couple apparently "flirted a little, and danced together, and she thought that was as far as it would go. But he supposedly just charmed her into a kiss, which turned to making out, which turned to her asking him to walk her back to her hotel — which turned into them having sex."
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He went on in some detail, adding that the man in question "is supposedly 10 years younger than her, and she said she lied and told him she was going through a divorce. She says she doesn’t know what came over her, and she just wanted to ‘see if she still had it’ but got carried away."
The husband said, "I want to leave her. She’s begging me not to, offering marriage counseling, never going out again, never drinking again, etc."
He noted, "I’ve always been a ‘one chance’ sort of guy. I just told her to go f--- herself and have been ignoring her … Now her friends and sister are calling me, too."
He continued, "I just want them all to leave me alone."
The husband said that when he told his mother about the drama "she said I should ‘think of my family’ and that my wife seems genuinely remorseful and didn’t try and hide anything, and came clean straight away. That it’s ‘not like she had an affair.’"
Added the husband, "I feel like I’m insane. Am I wrong for not even considering forgiving her?"
In a long update to his original post, the man told others in part, "As for my mother, she still thinks I should forgive her … She loves her. And she just wants everything to be OK."
He also wrote, "My daughter has no idea what is happening … I still have no idea what I’m going to do. Honestly, I’m still reeling."
Among the comments posted from others on the site was this opinion, which represented the way many other people felt: "Say bye ... It will happen again and again and again if you let it."
Wrote another person with a completely different point of view, which was also seconded by others: "Marriage counseling for sure. It is possible to get past this."
And this commenter took a more middle-of-the-road view of the situation: "Take some time and seriously think everything through. No need to make a decision right now if it just happened. You’ll feel different emotions every day and each week that passes."
Added that same commenter, "Let time filter out your disgust, anger, disappointment and every other emotion and see what’s truly left."
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Licensed clinical psychologist Kathy Nickerson who has presented marriage and relationship advice at more than 70 conferences, according to her website, believes that "most people who cheat [on a partner] are trying to deal with some pain they're experiencing."
She also wrote on her blog that those who have been betrayed by a spouse or partner may "feel shocked, devastated, betrayed, horrified, blind-sided and profoundly hurt."
The California-based psychologist also noted that people "can get through this … This doesn't mean your partner doesn't love you. You are not going crazy. You are just very, very hurt."
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