Seeking Integrity of Sherman Oaks, California recently published an educational blog discussing the cycle of sex addiction. As leading industry experts on sex addiction, known as compulsive sexual behavior disorder, they have extensive experience with how these addictions develop. With rates of porn and sex addiction on the rise, understanding this cycle is more important than ever.
The article begins with a discussion on the complexity of compulsive sexual behavior disorder, highlighting the nuance behind it. “Like any behavioral disorder, sex addiction is a complex process. There’s no simple cause, no one reason it happens,” it explains, “Instead, it follows a multi-faceted cycle, with distinct stages that lead to and interact with one another. Any model will simplify what it is helping to describe. Its purpose is to provide insight into the situation, not completely define it.”
The blog then breaks down the cycle of sex addiction into six key stages: Triggers, Fantasy and Preoccupation, Ritualization, Acting Out, Avoidance, and Despair. It describes each stage, while exploring its specific role.
It focuses first on triggers, describing them as inciting incidents for sexual addiction. “A trigger is anything that brings about a desire to escape through sexual thoughts, feelings, and actions. Triggers can be external: things like specific sounds, imagery, or smells…Triggers can also be internal: thoughts, feelings, and emotions.” It emphasizes that these can be positive events, not simply negative, and spotlights the importance of identifying potential triggers.
After briefly touching on fantasy and preoccupation, the discussion moves on to what can seem like a counterintuitive stage: ritualization. “With ritualization, the individual slowly begins mixing reality with fantasy. They may download explicit porn, watching it to boost their fantasies. They might drive to a local bar to look for potential partners.”
Critically, the authors underscore that this is the stage where the “high” from sex addiction becomes most prevalent. Often, individuals will delay sexual release or acting out in favor of falling into what the authors call “the bubble”. “In many cases, they will try to keep this stage going for as long as possible, pursuing their high for hours or days before moving on to action.”
The article concludes with the tail end of the addiction cycle: avoidance and despair. “After orgasm, the emotional escape experienced in the fantasy, ritual, and acting out stages of the cycle are either immediately or eventually replaced with feelings of shame and regret…the avoidance phase is where someone attempts to hide from these feelings.” Avoidance can take the form of specific coping mechanisms, as well as outright denials – “it’s not a big deal”, or “that doesn’t really count”.
The article continues that while not every individual will experience avoidance as a part of their specific addiction cycle, the final stage of despair is often overwhelming, and acts as a trigger for the cycle to repeat itself yet again.
“In this stage, the avoidance mechanisms have broken down. Typically, profound shame, guilt, and hopelessness will set in,” the authors conclude. “Unfortunately, this stage of the cycle looks a lot like the trigger stage of the cycle…the emotions morph into triggers,renewing the desire for emotional escape. In this way, the cycle of addiction can spin indefinitely.”
Seeking Integrity was founded in 2017 by sex and porn addiction specialists. They are a team of master’s-level clinicians and addiction experts. Their work has been cited in the National Library of Medicine, and their staff have been featured as subject matter experts for the New York Times, NPR, and more. To learn more about their organization and services, contact them through their website.
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For more information about Seeking Integrity, contact the company here:
Seeking Integrity
Erin Snow
1-747-234-4325
erin@seekingintegrity.com
14925 Ventura Boulevard, Suite 300
Sherman Oaks, CA 91403
